Get to Know our Member Spotlight: Nigel Holmes

Each month we highlight a Production Lot member through our Member Spotlights, which include a featured position on the Production Lot homepage and a Q&A to help the rest of our community get to know our Spotlight member better.

This month we’re highlighting Nigel Holmes!

Meet Nigel Holmes

Well hello. I am Nigel Holmes. The scriptwriter from old Blighty. A slightly eccentric English bloke who spends his days emptying his creative brain cells, through magical fingers, onto a titchy computer screen. Wearing glasses like the bottom of beer bottles due to the brightness and contrast always being accidentally set to maximum. “Ah ha!” exclaimed Aubrey the famous actor. “I never knew where all this squit came from.” Glenda looked at him quizzically. “Darling, I’ve been acting for at least a hundred years, and I’ve never seen one of those scripty-persons in daylight.” Well she wouldn’t would she? We’re almost hermits. Tapping away in some lonely gungy garrot, never seeing a shaft of sunlight. Suffering from vitamin D deficiency, not glimpsing the sky for years. Thankfully us English ones do occasionally manage to grab a cup of Rosy Lea and a Custard Cream, then in frustration at writer’s block, kick a passing badger.

Ready to learn more about Nigel? Check out our Q&A with him below, and don’t be shy – Ask him a question in the comments!

Spotlight Q&A: Six Questions with Nigel

What inspired you to pursue a career in the entertainment industry?

The pursuance was not on my side. It just turned up one day when I was looking the other way. Some would call it destiny. Others might call it stupidity. There I was having fun photographing women for a living (we’ll ignore that part of my life) when BOSH! Someone asked me to write a script for the village pantomime. That sounds like fun I thought and look what’s happened now. I sell pantomime scripts all over the world. Then, between typing “He’s behind you” a million times and putting suggestive comments into the mouths of hundreds of Widow Twankie’s, I started to experiment with funny stuff for TV. And here I am.

What is something about your role you'd like people to know more about?

Rejection, rejection, rejection. Then yet more rejection. But on a more positive note… Sometimes you get rejected politely.

If you can’t take being told your work is fit for stuffing a halibut, you are not pushing the limits of what your brain can churn out. If you love flagellation, flogging and bitchery, then become a scriptwriter.

However, if you finally hit the mark and get a gaggle of great actors wrapping their tonsils around your fabulous prose, it is one of the best feelings in the world. Try it. You’ll like it.

If you weren't in your current role, what other industry job would you like to have?

As a bit of a geek, it’s got to be taking over from the imperturbable happy clapper. The clapperboard slate creature. I mean, they give you this electronic bit of kit and you work on the set close enough to sniff the famous actors. Plus, you are the one who spouts that iconic line “Scene one, take two thousand and fifty-seven”. Who can resist a job where you get given a bit of paraphernalia that has those flashing numbers on the front? Heaven!

What advice do you have for people just starting out in the industry?

Enjoy every moment. Have fun. Appreciate your time on set. Make sure you have your pee before everyone else uses the hospitality wagon. Relish those small moments. Stop for a few seconds if you can and just look around at where you are and what this quirky group of numskulls are producing. It’s fantastic. It all started with a script, then, via the artistic process… BAM! Onto a screen to be viewed by the world. Wow! Step to one side for a jiffy and appreciate it all. Acknowledge your part in the process.

How would you like to advance your career in the industry?

Oooooo! Advancement! Yes please. My big goal is to write a sitcom that goes on forever or at least until the handle falls off. I want someone to let me write a comic ensemble piece where the lovely and discerning public get to know the characters so well that the show becomes a part of TV folk law. It’s already inside my head somewhere. It’s hilariously funny. I just need an enlightened producer to… Hold on! This is becoming a personal advert. Sorry! Moving quickly on.

What is your favorite production or project you've worked on?

Every production is the best and most favoured at the time. Wouldn’t it be extremely naughty to single something out?

Always my most beloved production is the one that I’m writing right now. Even though I’m probably typing junk. It’s in my bonce when I arise from my beauty sleep. It’s in my brain while I’m gulping down the extra healthy wheaty nib nobs. It’s in my head when I’m in the shower. As a writer you must know that the best is yet to come. Somewhere. Somehow. Someday. I hope.

Want a chance to be featured as a future Member Spotlight? It’s easy. Register for a Production Lot account, complete your member profile, then start engaging with the community!